Would you put up with what you say to yourself from another person? Or if you do, how do you feel afterward? When someone says or does hurtful things to you, you are able to move yourself away from that situation. What do you do then, if the person that does and says these things is you?
“Let us not forget that a man can never get away from himself” Johann Wolfgang von Goethe (1749-1832)
Self talk can be one of the most destructive or the most powerful thing in a person’s life. Is it enough to “be positive” in your words and actions? Or does it require more? I will let you answer that question for yourself.
However, in my life, just saying the positive words wasn’t enough. I had to learn how to believe them. Without going too deep into what your mind is and how it works in this article, please refer to Where is your Focus?. To put it simply there are 2 major parts to the way you think and react.
There is the conscious mind – the thinking part. What will I have for dinner? Where will we go for holidays? What course will I study? Then there is the most amazing, interesting and fascinating part – your unconscious or subconscious mind. This is the part that breathes you, pumps your heart, blinks your eyes, causes a reaction without you “thinking”, doing the same things over and over. This subconscious mind is so powerful that you can say one thing, but you do another. Why?
You may say that you deserve to be treated well, but from early childhood, people may have said that you will grow up to be no-good, or you may have “learned’ that Life is Hard, Rich People are Bad, Be Seen and Not Heard. There are so many different scenarios, but you know what they are for you. Be honest with yourself.
Recognize some of the talk you are undertaking with yourself. This can be very confronting, but it is an important step in changing your negative self-talk and building the self-respect we all deserve.